Animal Crossing Diary – Day 18 – I Suck @ Video Games

I’M THE Villager Jiggly. Remember me? The villager who became a town mayor, the one who wrote the Animal Crossing diary? The one with brown hair and the gray eyes, and the insatiable desire for leadership and respect? You remember. I wanted to be a symbol of evil in a shining century that didn’t have any place for the literal evil that I am. I even figured I’d do some good in a fashion – playing the caring mayor on the town stage.

And I was off to a good start the last time we talked. I had an approval rating of 100% amongst the townsfolk. I’d payed off my home loan and had started a public works project.

Then something utterly unforeseen took place. Well at least I hadn’t seen it coming. And when I left you, I was hanging from the proverbial cliff, you might say. Well, it’s all over now – what followed. I’ve survived, obviously. I wouldn’t be talking to you if I hadn’t. And the cosmic dust has finally settled; and the small rift in the world’s fabric of rational beliefs has been mended, or at least closed.

Just as the sun had gone down over Meowland and I was opening my eyes to the world outside my window the rain started to get heavier. The power went out and I was suddenly engulfed in pure blackness. I realised I wasn’t alone.

A set of white eyes came towards me – This was just like my dream. Suddenly a spotlight came on.

What the freak was this? As if breaking some kind of fourth wall, this Mr. Resetti began speaking about saving games and turning of machines. He mentioned that this would be the last time he expects to see me for two reasons.

I’m expected to never commit that of which I was accused again
He had no base of operations in town.

Like everyone in this town, he wanted something from me. He made me agree to inventing a new public works development in the order of building his new office.

Suddenly everything was back to normal. Well normal enough. It was now Monday morning. I went outside for a walk, trying to understand exactly what had happened. Whilst walking around, I heard a faint jingling sound. It was coming from a rock. I began to smash it with my shovel and a whole load of money came out of it. Perhaps another pirate hid his stash here. Well, it was mine now!

I went to the beach and collected all the shells to sell at Re-Tail. I also went and checked on my orchard. It was doing rather well indeed. Oranges, perfect apples, lemons and some other weird fruit everywhere! I took stock of my fruit and set some aside for the future and took the rest to sell. I got quite the sum of bells in return. I was up around $70,000. I also tried to sell a rusted tin can but it wasn’t wanted. In fact there would be a disposal fee…

I laughed in Reese’s face and told her not to worry. I had a sure fire way of disposing it at no cost. I sent Goaty Creature a letter…

I also figured I’d try selling something in the store to other townsfolk. The only thing I had on me was a pitfall seed, usefully worth $12. I figured I’d try my luck. After all, some of these animals are pretty stupid.

My pirate costume was starting to get old. I went to the tailor to see what was on show. I bought a dreamy looking starry shirt and a pair of Pilot Glasses. I continued on to Kicks and purchase some Heart patterned Stocking. They made my legs look amazing. I looked at my new style and couldn’t help but think I looked like Psy. That made me a little sad.

I went to the flower shop to buy a new axe as mine was starting to die. Before I could buy the axe, the sloth proprietor made me stand in the corner so he could watch me. I hate this guy. I will use the axe on him if he keeps this up.

I went to T&T Mart and bought some furniture. I am starting to get a collection of green items and kept that going with a green chair. I also purchase the fortune cookies. The trend lately has been one new prize and then a repeat of something I already had. This time it was a little different. After consuming the biscuits, both fortunes were brand new.

Straight back to the shop I went (after posing with my tickets at different locales) and threw them at the nookling. Gimmee! My first prize was a Wario mustache. It was pointy. My second ticket however, was not a winner. I’d come across one of these before. Oh well. Can’t win ’em all.

I went back to the tailor and made a new shirt design. I wanted it to be stylish, yet at the same time be something that screamed ‘me’. Hopefully the townsfolk will start to use it.

I headed down to the beach again to relax. I passed many of the animals, ignoring them because I didn’t feel like having a chit chat. I did turn around and give Fang a shout out as he was wearing my ‘M’ design from last week. I told him he looked snazzy.

I walked along the beach for a while and saw that stupid bird unconscious in the sand again. I kicked him in the head and he promptly awoke as amnesic as before. He said he forgot where he was going and that all he knew about the destination was that they make movies there in a place called Hollywood. Sounded like he knew where he was going to me. “Perhaps Hollywood?” I asked him. Naturally he grew excited and thanked me before flying off into the blue sky. Hopefully he gets sucked into a jet engine.

I caught the boat over to the tropical island. I did my usual ‘steal anything that is worth any money’ walk around the place and then went on some tours. First I did the Fossil Excavation tour. It was great. Not because of the fossils but because of all the cherry trees! I ended up nabbing about 50 cherries. I couldn’t wait to get home and cash in. I finished my other tour, the rock smashing one, and bid the island turtles adieu.

When I got back I set aside a few cherries to plant in my orchard and then rushed to Re-Tail to sell the rest. When I walked in, I saw that the blue llama creature was actually awake! It was astounding. His name was Cyrus and he was a bit of an asshole. He was quite disrespectful until his wife Reese clued him in on who I am.

I told him to calm his Elvis-ass down and to tell me his purpose in Meowland. As it turns out, he breathes new life into otherwise crappy and ugly furniture. I gave him a lawn chair and told him to make me impressed. We shall see how it turns out tomorrow.

I sold my cherries and headed to the post office. I had just under $100,000. I figured I should pay off my loan to Tom Nook.

As mayor, I thought aboutwhat I should do today that would be considered mayorish. I didn’t like Dizzy after our altercation yesterday and decided I would drive him out of town. I went and found him. Straight away he said he wanted me to buy something off of him. I declined.

This made him a little sad. Next I pushed him around a bit.

This angered him a little. Then I dug holes around him so he couldn’t move.

This pissed him right off. Next I went to his house and left messages on the ground for him.

They said “Dizzy Smells”. Next I went up to him and hit him with my bug catching net. I felt a little bad about this.

I don’t know what gave him the idea we were friends. I figured that was enough torture for the day and wrote him a letter. Hopefully it’s the first thing he sees in the morning.